Jillian

I have a friend for over 6 years. We used to live up the block from each other and for a time period we were inseperable. But I moved and now she goes away to school. We hardly ever see each other but no matter how long its been since the last time we talked, I can always call her when something goes wrong.Out of everyone I ever met she probably has the biggest heart. She absolutely loves animals. When we were younger she used to wake me up, or at least try, every Sunday to go with her to dog adoption centers. She is now in school to become a Vet. Since I've known her she always knew that was what she wanted to do. I am actually jealous of her for that reason. I am not that passionate about anything. I used to think I wanted to work with children but after my last job at a children's gymnastic place, I realized I don't.
Just a few weeks ago her brother got diagnosed with cancer. I want to be there for her as much as I can, but I don't even know where to start. I constantly call to see how he is doing but I don't feel like that is enough. And since she goes away to school she feels even worse that she can't be here to help him out. I feel so bad for her brother. He should have been graduating this May, but now he obviously is unable to. This only shows that the worst things only happen to the best of people.

The bReak up

My friends boyfriend recently broke up with her. I personally think the kid totally over reacted. Here is the situation...
One day we were all hanging out and someone who has the same phone as my friend Suzy picked up her phone thinking it was his. Well that was the crash and burn of her relationship. The kid who picked up her phone was her boyfriends friend so he just gave the phone to him to give it back to Suzy. So the boyfriend took it amongst himself to search her phone for evidence of her cheating. Even though he wasn't suspicious he went through everything. It turned out she still had an ex's phone number in her phone. Well that just set him off. He started calling everyone of her friends, including me, to see if we knew about this. And he even called her mother to say goodbye and to thank her for everything she has done for him. This was a little o.d. Just because she had the number doesn't mean she was cheating. It turns out she actually HATES her ex and her boyfriend at the time, knew this. Well they now have been broken up for about two months, and he can't even be her friend. She is completely devastated and feels she is wrong. I personally he just over reacted and is just insecure.

When is it too far?

Right after a person gets dumped, what is their first reaction? Revenge. But how far is too far? Usually a person can get with the ex's best friend or even better an enemy. The only thing you care about is to get your ex's attention any way you could. You can either show up everywhere the ex is and show him what hes missing. Or take the missing approach and avoid places he is going to be to make him curious. But these are baby games compared to what I have recently heard about a girl doing.
This girl and guy had a long distance relationship. He was in Mississippi, in the Marines. After about two months of them being together he didn't feel like the relationship was working. Aside from him being far away, his girlfriend was always nagging him. Whether it was he didn't get to call her back because he fell asleep early because he was waking up at 5 in the morning. Or because a girl commented his myspace. This girl was just not even trying to make the relationship work. It was as if she enjoyed the fighting. But as if he wasn't in enough stress with being there working constantly, he realized he didn't need this additional anxiety. So he called it quits. Well that was just unacceptable for this girl. She only called him more regardless of the time and constantly kept harassing his friends from home. She was going to his parents house complaining to them about him leaving her. And she was even thinking about telling him that she was pregnant to keep him around.
But just the other night she took it to a whole other level. Like I mentioned before he is in the Marines. She somehow got in touch with his command officer, or whatever they are called, and told him that the boy stole something from her and is refusing to give it back. The boy was just recently asked to go to Iraq. That no longer is an option for him. He is in deep trouble for this. Loyalty is a big thing in the Marines and now it seems as if he is a thief. This girl may have just ruined his career. That is just wrong, how selfish could a person be? Does destroying someone else's life make a broken heart heal? I personally don't think so.

Young Love <3

I just heard of a teenage relationship that makes me feel like I have the greatest boyfriend. Personally I think that a relationship should be about caring, support and loyalty. When I have a problem or when I just need someone to comfort me when I am feeling down I run to my boyfriend. My relationship isn't perfect, we fight here and there, but my boyfriend never makes me feel pathetic or embarrassed about our relationship. I never have to hide the things that he says or does to me from my friends because they would look at me in shame.
A story I was told the other day is a perfect example of an unhealthy relationship. A girl is in love with her boyfriend, she runs and jumps when he tells her to. When he doesn't have money for food she not only pays for it but will pick it up and bring it to where ever he is. You would think that he would truthly cherish her and realize how lucky he is to have found her. But you would have thought wrong. Instead he cheats on her any chance he gets and he doesn't even try to hide it. He doesn't tell her out of guilt, he just knows that she will be there no matter what he does. He verbally abuses her in public, to the point where other people feel uncomfortable about the situation. And when she finally break up with him he somehow reverses the situation and she is left begging for him back.
But I think the real winner in this whole relationship was something that was done a few weeks ago. It turns out that he went out one night and told her he was home and to come over later. So she went about her night waiting for his call. She was driving around with a friend and seen her boyfriend in a girls car. And this was a girl that she was told that he was cheating on her with. Her first reaction was to follow the car to confront them. Somehow when she got out of the car to go over to the car the girl hit her with the car. She was left bleeding in the street with some of her teeth missing. Her boyfriend never got out of the car to see if she was okay and the girl kept driving. She now has undergone major dental work and still goes out with the same guy. I just don't know what it going to take to make that poor girl realize she deserves more.

Back to Black

I love music. The music I listen to goes hand and hand with my mood. Three months ago I broke up with my boyfriend. Even though I still loved him, I felt like I needed a break. So whenever I would be driving, obviously I controlled the music selection. Whenever a friend would be in the car with me they would complain that before every song I would say " this song reminds me of Phil." This certain friend however is music illiterate. She doesn't listen to the songs meaning she just listens to the words. As long as the song has a catchy chorus or beat she loves it. Yet just a week ago her boyfriend broke up with her and shes trying to get a good myspace song.Who did she resort to, me of course. My myspace song never had anything to do with how popular it is at the moment, but how the song expresses my emotions for the moment.

A song that was gaining my interest lately was Back To Black by Amy Winehouse. Usually I don't like her music at all. But like I said before I just recently broke up with my boyfriend and I decided to see other people. I started dating someone immediately, whereas my boyfriend wanted to wait. After about a month I realized that I only wanted to be with my ex boyfriend. But, of course, at this time he was dating another girl. And I was unsure if I hurt him too much for him to forgive. Well this songs chorus just stood out to me. "We've only said goodbye in words" I think that is such a good line. Yes I told my boyfriend I didn't want to be with him anymore, but I didn't mean it from my heart, it was just words used in anger there wasn't enough emotion behind it to mean forever. I still only thought of him regardless to who I was with or what I was doing. Then the next few lines in the chorus is " You go back to her and I'll go back to black." This obviously hit home for me because if my ex decided to stay with the new girl he was now seeing, my heart was going to re break all over again.

The video is showing Amy Winehouse getting ready for a funeral for her heart. It is actually a pretty good video. Here it is...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aygAu1x2uQo

Inspiration

Life can change in a blink of an eye, and as much as we’ve heard this before I wanted to say it again. Life is nothing that we can just close our eyes to and hope for the hardships in life to go away, because that is called denial. You should always think wisely before making an impulsive decision. Because sometimes you regret your choices in life and someone is left disappointed. Everyone has their own opinions and problems, and each person reacts to them differently for reasons of individuality. So next time you are faced with a situation that seems too hard for you to bare, not only should you prove to others that you can make it through, but most importantly show yourself the amount of strength and courage that you have within. And most likely you will surprise yourself that you’re not as weak as you believed, and maybe you will realize that you’re capable of more than what you give yourself credit for.

Venting

The other night I was going to Albany to visit my boyfriend with a couple of friends. For some odd reason my parents are against me driving there. Therefore my friend was going to be the driver but she wasn't up to it so I drove. After three hours of driving and 1 mile left until my destination, I got pulled over. I was keeping up with traffic and was simply trying to get into the other lane because I didn't want to miss my exit. But even though I was going the same speed as everyone else on the road I was the unlucky one who attracted the cops radar. The cop even agreed with me that it seemed as if I was trying to get over but he still wrote me the ticket. Now my parents took my car away and are calling me irresponsible. Somehow they are blaiming all of this on my boyfriend. Meanwhile he wasn't even in the car nor telling me I should drive faster. My dad is also claiming that he has only received one ticket since he has started driving. So apparently, according to my parents, I am the only person in the world to ever get a speeding ticket.

Age

The other night I Was coming home from work when I recieved a text message from a cousin of mine. It said " Kristen you need to watch out for your younger cousin she is doing bad things." So after reading this I think she is involved with heavy drugs or cutting out of school. Turns out shes seeing a 26 year old( and she just turned 17.) Ok thats nine years. So eventually my older cousin called me and he was flipping that it is too big of an age difference. How come age only matters when you younger? What does a man who is that age want from a little girl? Perosnally I just think it is disgusting. But at what age does the difference in birth no longer matter? I have family members where the girl is about ten years younger than her husband. But seriously at the age 17 you should not have the same priorities as a 26 year old man. I totally understood where my cousin was coming from with forbidding the situation. But at what age does age just become a number?

American Pyscho

American Pyscho which is a movie that came out in 2000, goes along perfectly with my blog. This is a movie about an investment banker/ serial killer. This movie starts off just about this wealthy man who has this perfect job and he has an obession with his image. There is even a scene where he and a few of his colleagues are all sitting around a table showing off all of their business cards. They are very specific with the type of white they choose and type of font. Personally I couldn't tell the difference of any of them besides the different names on the card but to Patrick, the main character of the movie, he actually starts sweating because of his anger that someone elses card was considered nicer than his.
This movie starts off slow but then makes a huge turn around. It turns into alot of blood, murder, strange comments, and rape. At a bar scene Patrick is trying to get a bartenders attention but since it took her a while to get him his drink he tells her, something along the lines of, I want to stab you to death and play around with your blood. Patrick's absurd comments are always ignored, for some reason noone pays any attention to them.Meanwhile he ends up killing a bum, a colleague, two prostitutes and a few other people. He even tries confessing to his lawyer one night but he won't even listen to him, the lawyer thinks he is just joking.
By day Patrick was a normal business man but at night he descends into a world of madness, as he experiments with fear and violence. He doesn't just shoot his victims he tortures them, he took an axe to a man in one scene, he runs after a woman with a chainsaw in another. He is a sick man but noone will open their eyes to it.

anticipation

It is around that time again where the trees are starting to bloom, the days are brighter for longer, and jackets are no longer necessary. We are starting to hear children

yelling for the ice cream man to stop and waking to the birds sweet songs. Girls are no longer wearing boots, they are starting to pull out their flip flops. This is when school is coming to an end and slowly is turning into beach season.

This is my favorite time of the year. I love the late spring/ early summer. When I start to put away all of my winter clothes and start shopping for new summer outfits.

When all I care about is tanning and being with my friends,

I no longer have anxiety over school or exams. But this year

I was informed that I most likely am receiving a promotion

at work. This means more responsibilty and additional work hours, but more money. Do I want to trade in hanging out by my pool to being stuck in the mall listening to little kids crying? But I going to the Bahamas in June and planning on going to Florida in July. If I don't take this promotion will I have enough money to do this and still go out reguarly? I am sort of in a pickle. Most likely I am going to take it but I just hope I don't regret it or miss too many beach days.

Looking back

One year ago today I was a senior in high school. Getting ready for prom, searching for the perfect dress, and making lists of things I would need to buy for SeaSide. School was pratically over especially after the A.P. exams. Which I wasn't even planning on passing in the first place. I already decided on attending St. Johns at this time. Therefore I was no longer stressing college or the S.A.T.s but excited for the summer and prom. I went to prom with my "perfect" boyfriend and my best friends. We had a great time aside from the few fights and agruments. After that we went on the graduate and was getting ready to start moving forward in life.

Looking back now everything has changed. Now I realized that the perfect boyfriend was just a jerk. We don't even talk as friends anymore. And half of my best friends since junior high school, are only heard from when I run into them somewhere. My best friend who went away to college started off hating it and wanted to come home. Now she would rather be there than on Staten Island. I already see when she comes home from school she complains about what we do here and compares everything to Bighamton. I give it a year until she only comes home for Christmas break. This year I am also stressing finals, papers, and presentations. I've already changed my major and am thinking about going to another school. But next year I will probably say the same things about my new friends and goals. Because nothing is forever...

Life in the City

Life can pass us by so fast we don’t even know what hit us. One minute your walking down the street to where ever your destination is and people are beside you at all times. Going in the same direction as you at that point, but not necessarily going to make it to the end of the road with you. Some people hail down cabs and you wonder where they’re headed. Someone who was walking beside you wearing a suit slightly turns left and grabs a gold-brass door handle and enter a huge building and you want to know what job he or she has, head executive or an “administrative assistant”. None of us can help our minds wandering on us getting caught up in the moment. And that’s just what it is, a moment, a small one at that in this huge puzzle we try to piece together we call the world. Traffic stops short, why did only that one guy beep? What got him mad today? And that homeless person who is begging for change who gets more money from the government than any of us make at our jobs. What is he spending his money on that’s he’s begging for change? Cops sirens down the block, what happened? I’ll tell you what happened, life is passing you by just like that cab. Just like those people who walk faster then you and cut you off on the sidewalk. Like those people who jay-walk and are across the street down the block and your caught at the light. You can’t help it. its just the cards you were dealt and its not necessarily all in the suit that you wear.

Spiraling out of control

I was flipping through a magazine today and came across Lindsay Lohan. Nothing out of the norm, seeing her face with something bad written next to it. Anyways it was about a new movie shes going to be in. Her role in this movie is a nymphomanic waitress. It appears that she is desperate to get her movie career back because she is only receiving $75,000 for her part, whereas she recieved $75 million for Just my Luck. That means her role in this movie is paying only one percent of how much she recieved for her last movie. And in this movie has a topless sex scence and she volunteered to do more. Look at how much time changed Lindsay, being that just ten years ago she was in Parent Trap.
That is on the positive side of what shes doing with her life. I know when young adults finally turn twenty-one they go on little drinking sprees and go out to bars. Lindsay took it to a whole other level. The next article I came across was saying how regardless to her being in and out of rehab numerous amounts of times, this year alone, she is openly taking OxyContin and doing lines of coke. I guess this shows for how Lindsay went from a sweet red-headed girl to now playing her second movie role as a stipper.

Split personalities

Did you ever realize how in different situations or with different people your reactions are affected? Like how many personalities do you really possess? I know for a fact I have at least two. In school or in new situations I am completely shy and probably wouldn't talk unless someone starts the conversation and I would reply in short, quick responses. But when I'm with my friends or family I could be loud and hardly ever get embarassed, even if new people are around. Even friends that I've known for years still get shocked when I curse or do something to be center of attention. In a way I feel as if I have two sides of me.

creative nonfiction...

What is Creative Non-fiction?

There are many different types of writing and different procedures taken to develop them. We have Biographies, Autobiographies, Fiction, Nonfiction, Essays, Journals, and etc. Creative non fiction has many names in which it is referred, Literary Nonfiction, Narrative Nonfiction, Literary Journalism, Imaginative Nonfiction, Lyric Essay, Personal Essay, Personal Narrative, and Literary Memoir.

Barrie Jean Borich described Creative Nonfiction as a memory or fact-based writing that makes use of the styles and elements of fiction, poetry, memoir, and essay. It is writing about and from a world that includes the author's life and/or the author's individual perspective. This is a good definition of this genre of writing. This is accurate because all of the information presented in these types of stories are all factual but it seems like fiction because it is so detailed and interesting. It is as if your writing for entertainment rather then knowledge. “All Around the Town” is a perfect example of this. Those excerpts were all attention grabbing. But it seemed as if some of the information presented was false.

Something I read about creative nonfiction stated by Phil Druker was this style of writing shows you rather than tells you. I feel that this type of writing actually paints a picture in your mind. It makes you feel like you’re in the story rather than reading words off of a paper. Also some of the languages he encourages to use are vivid, useful details, metaphor, imagery, humor, rhythm and pace. These aren’t usually the languages for nonfiction writing but that’s what sets creative nonfiction aside from the broad genre of nonfiction. When I wrote the rough draft for the first assignment I just wrote the facts. But for the final draft I sat down for a while and thought about exactly why I wrote that paper. I basically analyzed everything and wrote down what went through my mind having to do with the topic I was writing about. Lee Gutkind feels that a creative nonfiction writer must have passion…

"A passion for the written word; a passion for the search and discovery of knowledge; and a passion for ... understand[ing] intimately how things in this world work."-Lee Gutkind


In conclusion those are a few examples of what creative nonfiction is. I feel like these writers go above and beyond because they don’t just state the facts but can make their writing come to life. After being introduced to this form of writing I’m most likely going to start using it more often. I’m sure my readers would appreciate it.

misunderstanding

I am receiving plastic surgery at the end of this year. So yesterday I was talking about it to a friend and a few hours later she called me up to tell me that a girl died from a boob job. After hearing this I started searching the computer to see why she passed away, was it a doctors fault? It turned out she had a bad reaction to the Anesthesia. When you go under Anesthesia your metabolism is supposed to decrease but this girls increased. The doctors noticed this and gave her an antidote used for malignant hyperthermia. Malignant hyperthermia makes the patient's heart rate rise, the metabolism increase, muscles become rigid, and could even give the patient a fever of over 110 degrees F. Between only one in five thousand and one in sixtyfive thousand of these incidents occur according to a website on the disorder. The girl passed away within twentyfour hours. So therefore she didn't pass away because of the cosmetic surgery, it wasn't the surgeons fault. The same thing could have happened if she would have ever had to undergo Anesthesia.

my relationship in a sentence

I pleaded him to change numerous times but the only time he took my seriously was when I told him we were over.

Are you a candidate?

Just the other day I was on the computer when I came across an interesting pop up. It said " Are you a candidate for breast implants?" This caught my interest so of course I opened it. It was a survery of about 10 questions. Some of the questions were, how old are you?, do you have any sort of diseases?, would you be willing to come back in a few years to get them redone?. The only question that I was unsure about was dealing with breast feeding. Being that I'm only eighteen years old I don't know if I would want to breast feed or use formula. It turned out however that I did qualify as a candidate. Obvesously I would have to go to a doctor to see what they would say. But I thought it was interesting that I would have some sort of idea of the questions and things a doctor keeps in mind when a woman comes to him for a boob job.

Some Statistics

Top Five Surgical Cosmetic Procedures in 2006

Liposuction ... 403,684

Breast Augmentation ... 383,886

Eyelid Surgery ... 209,999

Abdominoplasty ... 172,457

Breast Reduction ... 145,822

Top Five Nonsurgical Cosmetic Procedures in 2006

Botox ... 3,181,592

Hyaluronic Acid ... 1,593,554

Laser Hair Removal ... 1,475,296

Microdermabrasion ... 993,071

Laser Skin Resurfacing ... 576,509


Surgical and Nonsurgical Cosmestic Procedures in 1997

Liposuction ... 176,863

Breast Augmentation ... 101,176

Eyelid Surgery ... 159,232

Botox ... 65,157

Chemical Peel ... 481,227

Laser Skin Resurfacing ... 154,153

A slave to the scalpel

There are many things a person can become addicted to like nicotine, caffeine, alcohol, gambling, etc. It turns out that people can even be addicted to plastic surgery. A woman named Jenny from the age of 25 to 28 received 26 surgeries. She said she was a slave to the scalpel. And if you think smoking is an expensive habbit you should think again. She spent about $80,000 on her surgeries. After all of this she still feels theres many other things she would like to get done. She takes poor self esteem to a whole other level. She received her first surgeries because of comments that her ex-husband passed about her.
In other stories I read about the extents these women will take to have money for these surgeries. It ranged from a woman stealing, one woman starring in a gang-bangs, and even a woman putting her family in debt to the point where her husband had to threaten her with divorce. These women are willing to risk their lives and spend thousands of dollars just for the idea of perfection.

The gift

All teenagers are concerned on their looks. And some kids will go as far as to ask their parents for plastic surgery for either a graduation or a birthday present. I personally know someone who had recieved 3 nose jobs before entering high school and for her 19th birthday her present was a pair of new boobs.I even read a bunch of articles talking about teenagers as young as twelve that have gone under the knife. These kids had such little self esteem to the point where they were failing in school because they refused to go. I don't think I would allow my child to have any surgery done because I feel like your making your child have even lower self esteem because your agreeing with them that they need work done.
However in other articles I read that only 5 percent of college females actually had cosmetic surgery but more then 60 percent of the students said they could see themselves getting something done at one point in their life.

Whats this going to be about?

Just the other night I was wondering what I going to do this blog about... Then as I was watching vh1 and came across "plastic surgery obession" and it really caught my attention.. all over the news we see which actress is getting bigger boobs or a new nose.. and it seems as if the older these celebrities get the younger they try to look.. I think plastic surgery is a waste of time and money . People should allow themselves to gradually get older and just except their natural beauty that God has given them.. I aslo seen an MTV True Life on "I am getting plastic surgery".. one of the situations was a man getting calf inplants.. I just feel that was ridulous he could have just went to the gym and worked them out but instead he had gotten surgery and wasn't able to walk for weeks.. So for the rest of the spring term I'm going to be writing entirely about plastic surgery whoes receiving it, who has gotten it, and all the different procedures..